Friend or Foe?

You know, I definitely feel as though I add more value to people’s lives than they add to mine. I've come to a decision to end a friendship. I figure that if you’re really friends, you can and should be upfront and honest with people; especially those that you call / consider your friends. Right? Well, I have a situation where I feel the other person isn't being direct with me. I feel that they have been lying to me and withholding information. After this weekend, I will see if I can catch them in the lie. If I don’t, I will voice my grievances and then allow them to retort. If I feel that they are still being dishonest, I’ll sever all ties. I’m the type of person where I am very blunt and direct. Maybe this is to a fault. Maybe some people can’t handle my directness and think that I would jump off the deep end or something like that. I may be high strung, but come on; I am an adult.

Maybe after everything, I’ll tell you the whole story. Right now, I’m just a little too pissed to. Just know that I’m not only losing one, but two friends.

It’s kind of weird because you do a lot for your friends, and for this one, I really did. It’s not as though I’m asking for any accolades or pats on the back because I believe that when you are a friend and you do things, it should be genuine without looking for something in return, but GODDAMN! Give me a little credit and a little respect for our friendship. I believe that I’m a dang good friend to those I consider friends so to be lied to repeatedly (allegedly) and treated with blatant disregards for my feelings just has me like what the fuck? Like seriously, what the everlasting fuck?

Also, it’s a good thing that I’m not how I used to be. I could be a very dangerous person. I don’t mean dangerous in a physical sorts even though it would be nothing for me to hurt someone—BACK THEN… back then. I’m semi changed now, but no. I could be a dangerous person with information. I just don’t want to do that. It’s not in me anymore. I just really hope that they realize what a good friend in me they had. Now if I was in the wrong in any capacity, I wouldn't mind, hell I’d appreciate it more, if people will tell me. It wouldn't be nothing to say, “Hey you were fucked up for that,” or something. We’re all adults, and if we are the friends that we say we are, then it shouldn't be a problem. I definitely don’t have a problem with telling someone they were wrong or that they handled something incorrectly. I don’t know. It’s just a little jacked up.

Anyway… Thanks for listening to me whine. I’ll have an update for you guys Wednesday. Or Monday if I have confirmation. Anyways... 

Till then…